chevychompers
February 28th, 2002, 10:07 PM
I never have quite figured out why the ---ual urges
of men and women differ so much.
I never have figured out the whole Mars & Venus thing.
And I never have figured out why men think with their head and
women with their heart.
Also, I never have figured out how ---ual desire gets thrown
into a state of turmoil when it hears the words, "I do".
One evening last week, my wife and I were getting into bed.
Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she then says,
"I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me."
I said, "WHAT?!"
So she says the words that I and every other husband on the planet dreads.
She explains that I must not be in tune with her emotional needs as a women.
I'm thinking, "What was her first clue?"
I finally realized that nothing is going to happen that night, so I went to sleep.
The very next day we went shopping at a big,
unnamed department store...
I walked around while she tried on three very expensive outfits.
She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her to take
all three of them.
She then tells me that she wants matching shoes worth $200 each
to which I say, "OK."
And then we go to the jewelry dept. where she gets a set of diamond earrings.
Let me tell you...she was so excited!
She must have thought that I was one wave short of a shipwreck,
But I don't think she cared.
I think she was testing me when she asked for a tennis bracelet
because she doesn't even play tennis.
I think I threw her for a loop when I told her it was OK.!
She was almost ---ually excited from all of this and you should have
seen her face when she said, "I'm ready to go, let's go to the cash
register."
I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out,
"No honey. I don't feel like buying all this stuff now."
You should have seen her face...it went completely blank.
I then said, "Really honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while."
Just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added,
"You must not be in tune with my financial needs as a Man."
I figure that I might be having --- again sometime during the Spring
thaw of 2003.
of men and women differ so much.
I never have figured out the whole Mars & Venus thing.
And I never have figured out why men think with their head and
women with their heart.
Also, I never have figured out how ---ual desire gets thrown
into a state of turmoil when it hears the words, "I do".
One evening last week, my wife and I were getting into bed.
Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she then says,
"I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me."
I said, "WHAT?!"
So she says the words that I and every other husband on the planet dreads.
She explains that I must not be in tune with her emotional needs as a women.
I'm thinking, "What was her first clue?"
I finally realized that nothing is going to happen that night, so I went to sleep.
The very next day we went shopping at a big,
unnamed department store...
I walked around while she tried on three very expensive outfits.
She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her to take
all three of them.
She then tells me that she wants matching shoes worth $200 each
to which I say, "OK."
And then we go to the jewelry dept. where she gets a set of diamond earrings.
Let me tell you...she was so excited!
She must have thought that I was one wave short of a shipwreck,
But I don't think she cared.
I think she was testing me when she asked for a tennis bracelet
because she doesn't even play tennis.
I think I threw her for a loop when I told her it was OK.!
She was almost ---ually excited from all of this and you should have
seen her face when she said, "I'm ready to go, let's go to the cash
register."
I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out,
"No honey. I don't feel like buying all this stuff now."
You should have seen her face...it went completely blank.
I then said, "Really honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while."
Just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added,
"You must not be in tune with my financial needs as a Man."
I figure that I might be having --- again sometime during the Spring
thaw of 2003.