This is Funny!

[BrainDamage]

Um.. I am not sure how to describe this, so you'd better look for yourself. Click HERE (http://webworst.about.com/gi/dynamic/offsite.htm?site=http%3A%2F%2Fugweb.cs.ualberta.ca%2F%7Edavidson%2Fbathroom%2F)

The web has everything!

[Psycho99]

LMAO!!:D:D.....I have pee-shivers!!:eek:

~~The Psycho

[cansatfan]

BD - now I'm convinced that you've got too much time on your hands......

[crownvic]

You need another vacation before you are BrainDead..:D lol

[chevychompers]

Don't double dip :) :)

[Xelon]

Hehehe...."bathronauts"? Too funny!!!:D

Xelon

[Xelon]

Hehehe...."bathronauts"? Too funny!!!:D

Xelon

[BrainDamage]

You all know the old joke: What do toilet paper and the Enterprise have in common? They both circle Uranus searching for Klingons.

Sorry.

You all do know the rating system for a dump, right?

There are several categories:

1. Length of each piece
2. How many times it wraps itself around the bowl
3. If it actually has any surface breakage (ie, sticks up out of the water)
4. If there is any visible food, how much?
5. How many flushes does it take to get it all down.

Each of these items is rated with a number for a 5 number score..

ie. 40032 would mean 4 pieces, 0 wraps around, no surface breakage, 3 pieces of visable food, 2 flushes.

Got it?!?

And, yes guys, I have more time on my hands than I care to admit to. I actually found this site while playing with THIS ONE (http://www.createafart.com/index.asp)

[Bone Daddy]

Nice Brain, I liked the super long wet deathlike fart...LMAO

[Sgt_Stedenko]

ROTFL

[BrainDamage]

Gotta love bathroom humor!

Ever get one of those really wet beer sh!ts, and when you go to wipe, it is so slippery that your hand goes halfway up your back? I really hate when that happens. :Z


I am not going to get in trouble for being too gross here I hope... I have seen some of what has been written here, and this is tame!

[Sgt_Stedenko]

Ever get one of those really wet beer sh!ts, and when you go to wipe, it is so slippery that your hand goes halfway up your back? I really hate when that happens

GEEZ!!! :gg :gg ;)

[BrainDamage]

Originally posted by Sgt_Stedenko


GEEZ!!! :gg :gg ;)


So I guess your answer is YES?

[Sgt_Stedenko]

So I guess your answer is YES?

Yup. :Z :R :(

The only thing you can do at that point, is jump straight into the shower. Either that or use up a whole roll of TP.

[Bone Daddy]

ROTFLMAO
God you two!!!Or when you try to fart and it brings "friends"..Hate that...HI SGT See me posting in the newbie section again??LOL HI Brain always love to see your point of view on things..lol:eek:

[BrainDamage]

Or... speaking of farts... how about when you fart in the shower? That is bad enough.. but, when you have a MAJORLY HEAVY STEAM going... MAN! Right up the nostrils! And it lingers! The only way to get away from it is to run.

[Sgt_Stedenko]

There's nothing worse than farting in the shower. The hot air keeps the fumes at nostril level. :Z :eek:

Hi Bone. Yes, I did see you posting in there. :cool:

[chevychompers]

Come on now, you guys know you turn around to get a better wiff....:)

[Bone Daddy]

I don't need to turn around to kill plants...As a side note my lab puppy farts ALL THE FREAKIN TIME!!Same food nothing special..I had to apoligize in front of company cause it reaks...But he's soo cute , he just wags his tail and licks me(not that way pervs)But he could block out the sun...Christ I was proud of myself, but this dog waters eyes...Any help???

[elk32170]

"But he could block out the sun..." :D :D bwa hahahahaha!!

I read "lab puppy" as "puppy in a laboratory" instead of "labrador puppy" and all I could think of was you in some dark lab force-feeding a dog a whole bottle of Head-n-Shoulders. :( That pic'll take a while to get out of my head...

...which reminds me of an old Steve Martin quote. In one of his old standup routines, he would say, "I was just sitting at home, doing terrible things to my dog with a fork, when..." :eek: :eek:

...jeez, I really meant to have a point to this post, but it's just not coming through... ;)

.elk

[Bone Daddy]

He He He..This son of a gun just did it again..I squeezed him and he farted on me...I'm not going to touch him again..I swore I never fed him cabbage...Is there a beno for dogs....??Women don't find this as humorous as my guy friends do..BRB gotta open a window..

[BrainDamage]

Originally posted by Bone Daddy
I don't need to turn around to kill plants...As a side note my lab puppy farts ALL THE FREAKIN TIME!!Same food nothing special..I had to apoligize in front of company cause it reaks...But he's soo cute , he just wags his tail and licks me(not that way pervs)But he could block out the sun...Christ I was proud of myself, but this dog waters eyes...Any help???

Bone Daddy - You are so lame! Quit blaming the dog! How long do you think you can get away with that anyway?

If you want to manufacture a real stink bomb, feed your dog cabbage!

[Bone Daddy]

I'm proud of my stinkers!!!I claim all them babies..I will not take second fiddle to my puppy..He really farts all the time..Not sick, should I try a different dog food?Just a phase?Gonna crack another window and light a candle..

[BrainDamage]

I feed my dog Eukanuba Response formula. It is only available from a veterinarian, and is quite expensive.. but, my dog sh!ts about 80% less and does not expell noxious fumes at all.

[Psycho99]

Well...i don't mind stewing in MY own farts :eek:.....it's fun, and you can always compare them to one another!:gg

~~The Psycho

[BrainDamage]

Originally posted by Psycho99
Well...i don't mind stewing in MY own farts :eek:.....it's fun, and you can always compare them to one another!:gg

~~The Psycho

Would someone PLEASE light a match.. this forum is begining to stink... on the other hand, a flame could cause a methane explosion.. Better use Lysol instead.

[chevychompers]

http://fool.capellan.ru/sm/fart.gif

[BrainDamage]

I hate to screw things up here and post a serious question, so my apologies in advance.

I am thinking of getting a UTV unit from Rat Shack ($80).

Other than hacking my Hu with a 3m that supports the UTV tier, what else do I need to know? I know, I could search, but I figure one of you guys has to know.

And, if UTV is a recording device, why does it need hacking? Is it because it uses it's own Hu? Why would the UTV need an Hu to record? I suppose it does not get it's input from the IRD?

Thanx!

[Bone Daddy]

Well i have one..Great unit but yes you need the UTV teir to use any UTV functions(you get 10 min of recording for free)There is no hack for UTV like Tivo, only putting in a larger hardrive..But the good news is the UTV teir stays up for a long time..PS these run hot as hell so put a fan or some distance between componets..Any other questions?Oh and the reason you need the teir is the video runs on buffered memory from the hardrive, so the hardrive runs constantly, thus the heat...

[BrainDamage]

Originally posted by Bone Daddy
Well i have one..Great unit but yes you need the UTV teir to use any UTV functions(you get 10 min of recording for free)There is no hack for UTV like Tivo, only putting in a larger hardrive..But the good news is the UTV teir stays up for a long time..PS these run hot as hell so put a fan or some distance between componets..Any other questions?Oh and the reason you need the teir is the video runs on buffered memory from the hardrive, so the hardrive runs constantly, thus the heat...

OK.. so by adding the tier I don't have the 10 minute limit and can record all I want? And, do I need a separate cable for the UTV? I have one cable which goes to the IRD, and that is all I have in the room. Getting another cable in there would be next to impossible. I do have a dual LNB with a multi-switch, but the house was pre-wired before I moved in. If I need a separate cable I am out of luck.
Thanks Bone Daddy!

[Bone Daddy]

Yes you need the second cable , without it you can't use PIP and when you record on one channel you have to watch it..SUCKS..Plus the second tuner has been known to become squirly so keep the unit cool..And with the UTV teir you can record to your hearts desire, real nice playback...

[BrainDamage]

Originally posted by Bone Daddy
Yes you need the second cable , without it you can't use PIP and when you record on one channel you have to watch it..SUCKS..Plus the second tuner has been known to become squirly so keep the unit cool..And with the UTV teir you can record to your hearts desire, real nice playback...

OH well.. so much for getting UTV.. I am not going to be able to string a cable. That blows. Thanks for the help.

[Bone Daddy]

But if you do get it for 80 bucks it comes with a HU card..I'd grab that puppy use the one tuner and record programs when you're sleeping, working etc..Get that for 80 bucks!!!!Awesome deal..

[BrainDamage]

Originally posted by Bone Daddy
But if you do get it for 80 bucks it comes with a HU card..I'd grab that puppy use the one tuner and record programs when you're sleeping, working etc..Get that for 80 bucks!!!!Awesome deal..

So what you are saying is that I can use the cable that goes into my IRD and put it in the UTV, then out of the UTV into my IRD? Just no PIP or watching one show while recording another because the UTV has no tuner?

edit: I just called my local Rat Shack.. they have the RCA 490RE on sale for $79. They say it is a tuner and recorder.. so, I would replace my current IRD. I understand now.. I thought the UTV was a stand alone recorder. So what is with the 10 minutes of free recording stuff? I just buy the UTV, activate it, use my hacked HU with the UTV tier, and I am all set.. as a matter of fact, if I am using my own .bin, it should have an active UTV tier anyway..

If I am correct, I would have to call DTV to activate my UTV unit. Once they activate it, I read the card, clone the .bin to another card, add my 3m, and I am done.

What have I missed?

Thanks again!

[Bone Daddy]

The UTV has 2 tuners built in, operated by one card.I say get the UTV and move the other receiver to somewhere else in the house..UTV has 2 coax inputs i for each tuner, If you use just one them no PIP but you can still record shows at future dates/times..Get that unit!!!

[elk32170]

I have nothing to add; I just felt the uncontrollable urge to participate in the fart thread. ;) This one has the potential to be legendary.

.elk

[Sgt_Stedenko]

I think I'm about to expel some gas here. :Z

[BrainDamage]

Originally posted by Bone Daddy
The UTV has 2 tuners built in, operated by one card.I say get the UTV and move the other receiver to somewhere else in the house..UTV has 2 coax inputs i for each tuner, If you use just one them no PIP but you can still record shows at future dates/times..Get that unit!!!

Going to get it now... $79 for the RCA 490RE at Rat Shack. The thing is, they make you give them I.D. and your account number and stuff.. big deal I suppose.

[BrainDamage]

Originally posted by elk32170
I have nothing to add; I just felt the uncontrollable urge to participate in the fart thread. ;) This one has the potential to be legendary.

.elk

Thank you. Thank you very much. Glad I could amuse you...

[Bone Daddy]

Is this the fart thread?? Well i posted my gaseous reply in the wrong one..I had bad chinese last night(the food guys) and molson's..I think my puppy might be put to the test...But he seems to like my farts..Thought dog's sense of smell was better than ours..And I can't stand these babies..:eek: :eek: :eek: :eek:

[BrainDamage]

Originally posted by Bone Daddy
Is this the fart thread?? Well i posted my gaseous reply in the wrong one..I had bad chinese last night(the food guys) and molson's..I think my puppy might be put to the test...But he seems to like my farts..Thought dog's sense of smell was better than ours..And I can't stand these babies..:eek: :eek: :eek: :eek:

Um... I hate to break the news to ya.. but you are talking about an animal that enjoys drinking from the toilet and sniffing crotches... What makes you think your dog would not enjoy a fart?

Now that I think about it, sniffing crotches is not all that bad... of course I am speaking of the opposite ---!

By the way, you do know why dogs lick their own private parts? Because they can! Note, I used the term "PRIVATE PARTS" because I did not know if "balls" would be appropriate.

[Bone Daddy]

LMAO I guess you're still here so balls is alright..You sub right? When you get the UTV just call DTV and they'll activate the new card, keep the old as a spare..I did

[BrainDamage]

Originally posted by Bone Daddy
LMAO I guess you're still here so balls is alright..You sub right? When you get the UTV just call DTV and they'll activate the new card, keep the old as a spare..I did

Yup, I sub. OK.. will do it.. Just hope it does not prompt them to send me a P4 anytime sooner!

[BrainDamage]

Originally posted by Bone Daddy
LMAO I guess you're still here so balls is alright..You sub right? When you get the UTV just call DTV and they'll activate the new card, keep the old as a spare..I did

I guess so.. balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls

Yup, you are right. Still here. Must be alright.

[Bone Daddy]

Originally posted by BrainDamage


I guess so.. balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls

Yup, you are right. Still here. Must be alright.

Ahhhh forget it...How did we get from farts to balls???Oh yea the reach around..LMAO:eek: :R :eek: :Z

[BrainDamage]

Originally posted by Bone Daddy
LMAO I guess you're still here so balls is alright..You sub right? When you get the UTV just call DTV and they'll activate the new card, keep the old as a spare..I did

Alright.. one more question... I did not get the UTV unit today. A friend of mine is buying 2 tomorrow and then will sell me one of them.. that way my name is not on one. Since my name is not going to be on one, I will not have to activate it.

Can I, or can I not record without a limit if I do not subscribe the UTV unit? Or, is all I need is the UTV tier on my card?

Thanks again!

[Psycho99]

Wel...if HTML was enabled...I'd give you all a wav file of what a fart was supposed to sound like.....LMFAO!!:D Bones...you know i've gotten good at causin' a ruckus...you've been to SFS...:eek:


~~The Psycho

[Bone Daddy]

LMAO yup but I'm locked out of SFS right now, page cannot be found error!!..
Brain you need to add the teir if you don't sub, but like I said it stays up forever..I added 3 UTV teirs to my sub card and it was 2+ weeks and going strong..

[BrainDamage]

Originally posted by Bone Daddy
... Brain you need to add the teir if you don't sub, but like I said it stays up forever..I added 3 UTV teirs to my sub card and it was 2+ weeks and going strong..

Thanks... I have a 3m that has the tiers, so I think that should do it. I am going to set this sucker up tonight if everything goes as planned. Rat Shack asks for I.D. and blood, and I do not want to give the info.. so, a friend of mine is purchasing two units for his account and will only use one of them. I will buy the second.

Hopefully the Rat Shack police won't cause trouble.

[Bone Daddy]

Don't say I didn't give anything to the hobby..I just got back from RATSHACK it seems the stores are going to stop selling resisters and other small stuff...You can still order it online, but bad news to some of my tester friends...

[Sgt_Stedenko]

Radio Shack used to be a good place to buy all sorts of odds and ends in electronics. Nowadays, forget it. :(

Not only that, the people working in there know jack squat.

[elk32170]

Originally posted by Sgt_Stedenko
Radio Shack used to be a good place to buy all sorts of odds and ends in electronics. Nowadays, forget it. :(
I have never liked shopping at Radio Shack, and in fact have not since around 1990.

Not only that, the people working in there know jack squat.
My twist on their slogan: "You've got questions? We've got blank stares." ;)

.elk

[Bone Daddy]

Hey I usted to be a manager there.....LMAO Till I got a little store and no help..7 days a week open to close, plus a 4,000 paycut..Told them to kiss my heiny...But would be a great place to part time and get discontinued stuff....

[BrainDamage]

Originally posted by Bone Daddy
Hey I usted to be a manager there.....LMAO Till I got a little store and no help..7 days a week open to close, plus a 4,000 paycut..Told them to kiss my heiny...But would be a great place to part time and get discontinued stuff....

Me too.. managed a store in Miami in the early 80's.

[Sgt_Stedenko]

I went in there last week looking for a rj11-DB9 adapter. The moronic salesman looked at me and said there was no such thing. I told him there was and walked out of the store.

[chevychompers]

Originally posted by Sgt_Stedenko
I went in there last week looking for a rj11-DB9 adapter. The moronic salesman looked at me and said there was no such thing. I told him there was and walked out of the store.

That's what they told me too Sarge. I looked around and found the parts to make them. They are: #276-1513- D-Sub Hood and #276-1428A- D-Sub Female crimp-type connector. Cost about $3.00.

[Bone Daddy]

LMAO chevy!!! I had tons of those numbers commited to memory..I still walk in and bust those idiots..

[Sgt_Stedenko]

I was planning on using some phone cable with rj11 ends to emu with. When I couldn't find the adapters, I just got some cat5 cable and DB9 ends and made myself a cable that way.

Hehehe...there is always more than one way to skin a cat. :gg ;)

[BrainDamage]

Originally posted by Sgt_Stedenko
I was planning on using some phone cable with rj11 ends to emu with. When I couldn't find the adapters, I just got some cat5 cable and DB9 ends and made myself a cable that way.

Hehehe...there is always more than one way to skin a cat. :gg ;)

I don't know if you have seen any of my past posts on this subject or not, but I have always recommended using CAT5 and making your own serial ports.. the cable is much better than phone cable and travels better.

[BrainDamage]

This is a public post to thank Chevychompers for allowing me to use his avatar.

Thanks Chevy! You are not as bad as everyone else says you are!

[chevychompers]

Originally posted by BrainDamage
This is a public post to thank Chevychompers for allowing me to use his avatar.

Thanks Chevy! You are not as bad as everyone else says you are!

You are very welcome Brain, although I didn't make it I just found it on the net a while back. If you need me to take you in a bathroom stall and show you how it works just holler :gg :)

[Psycho99]

Originally posted by chevychompers


You are very welcome Brain, although I didn't make it I just found it on the net a while back. If you need me to take you in a bathroom stall and show you how it works just holler :gg :)


:eek:...."i said i'd treat cha if i meet cha in bathroom....:eek::eek:....quoted frum GWAR..LMFAO!!!

~~The Psycho

[BrainDamage]

Originally posted by chevychompers


You are very welcome Brain, although I didn't make it I just found it on the net a while back. If you need me to take you in a bathroom stall and show you how it works just holler :gg :)

Ya! Alright! That was more info than I needed!

[Sgt_Stedenko]

I don't know if you have seen any of my past posts on this subject or not, but I have always recommended using CAT5 and making your own serial ports.. the cable is much better than phone cable and travels better.

Yes I have. I initially wanted to go with phone cable because I have a bunch of it laying around wasting space. When I couldn't find the adapters, I went with cat5.

The ironic thing is cat5 is cheaper in price than phone cable. I got 50 feet for $7.50 . The DB9 ends were 75 cents each. :cool:

[BrainDamage]

Originally posted by Sgt_Stedenko


Yes I have. I initially wanted to go with phone cable because I have a bunch of it laying around wasting space. When I couldn't find the adapters, I went with cat5.

The ironic thing is cat5 is cheaper in price than phone cable. I got 50 feet for $7.50 . The DB9 ends were 75 cents each. :cool:

Just shows to go ya!

I am psyched! I just got an Ultimate TV RCA 490RE for $79! It came with no manual or remote control, but, Rat Shack is having it mailed to me at no charge. It also came with an Hu! So, I guess my valid subbed .bin is going to have a UTV tier now!

Cool!

[Sgt_Stedenko]

You might be able to download a manual for the UTV if you go to the DTV website.

[BrainDamage]

Originally posted by Sgt_Stedenko
You might be able to download a manual for the UTV if you go to the DTV website.

Thanks for the info... I went to the RCA site and did not find a manual.. I will try DTV's site now.

Here is the million dollar question... I have a dual lnb dish. I have ONE cable coming to my IRD (to be replaced with UTV unit). If I take a diplexer (the splitter with the input for cable/sat) and put my satellite into that, and then split it to the two inputs, will that work? I really have no way of getting a second cable to the unit, and I would like to watch one program while recording another.

Thanks!

edit: I put 490re into the DTV search engine.. no results. I will wait for the manual to come in the mail with the remote control. I have to program my universal remote anyway.

[Sgt_Stedenko]

I'm not sure, but UTV might have their own website too.

[Bone Daddy]

Manual shoot never looked at mine,if i could find it I'll send it to ya..Very cool unit..

[Sgt_Stedenko]

I found your manual on the RCA website.

Follow this link and look halfway down the page. When you see the instruction manual box, choose the model number which you have (DWD490RE). It's in acrobat format.

http://www.rca.com/customerservice/product_sys_help/0,5193,CI700067,00.html

[BrainDamage]

Originally posted by Sgt_Stedenko
I found your manual on the RCA website.

Follow this link and look halfway down the page. When you see the instruction manual box, choose the model number which you have (DWD490RE). It's in acrobat format.

http://www.rca.com/customerservice/product_sys_help/0,5193,CI700067,00.html

Found it thanks to you! I really appreciate your finding that for me... now, can you find me 65 pages of paper to print this out on?:R

[Bone Daddy]

Dang newbies..lol Found it thanks to you! I really appreciate your finding that for me... now, can you find me 65 pages of paper to print this out on?..
Tell you what Brain, if you'll come over and paint my house I'll set the system up for you...LMMAO!!!:cool:

[BrainDamage]

I am not sure how many of you have Ultimate TV, but, I just got this info from the DTV website:
-----
Choose from three UltimateTV® service options:


Option 1 $9.95/Month


UltimateTV Service

Up to 35 hours* of Digital Video Recording

Live TV Controls (live pause, rewind, instant replay)

Picture-in-Picture: Watch and record two live shows at the same time

14-day searchable Advanced Program Guide™ for DIRECTV® programming

3 hours per month of Internet connect time for Internet on TV and interactive TV features

6 E-mail accounts

Automatic software upgrades
---------

Do I really need to pay for this? Or, can I just add the tiers to my card. I assume that if I add the tiers I can get the service for free, but, when I was at Rat Shack they took all of my info (driver license, DTV account #, blood type, etc..) So, they are expecting me to subscribe it.

What say you?

[Bone Daddy]

No when I activated mine with DTV I told them I wanted the HI-FI output for my surround sound system and PIP...Never subscribed for UTV service...

[BrainDamage]

Originally posted by Bone Daddy
No when I activated mine with DTV I told them I wanted the HI-FI output for my surround sound system and PIP...Never subscribed for UTV service...

Cool.. that is what I will do. I am going to tell whoever I speak with at DTV to look at Bone Daddy's account and do the same for me. :gg

The people at Radio Shack are idiots... They know NOTHING... When I worked there as a manager in the 80's, we had to know what we were selling.. today you call and ask if they have something, and they ask you for a catalog number. I don't know about you, but even during a marathon dump, I do not read the Rat Shack catalog.

[chevychompers]

To get this thread back on subject.....

http://www.chevychompers.netfirms.com/TowYardComplaint.mp3

[Bone Daddy]

Very nice chomps!!!!2 by 4 in the back seat....Where did you find that gem????LOL:eek:

[elk32170]

Originally posted by chevychompers
To get this thread back on subject.....

http://www.chevychompers.netfirms.com/TowYardComplaint.mp3

Excuse me....what does "on subject" mean? ;)

.elk (deja-vu ... or is that deja-moo? ;) )

[Bone Daddy]

Elk's just jealous , he can't pinch a loaf that'll fill a back seat..Not enough ruf---e if you ask me..LMAO

[BrainDamage]

I just wonder if the guy who left his log in the backseat looked at the toilet paper after wiping or not.. I also noticed that the woman did not say if there was any visable food left in it.

Chevy, can you answer these questions for me please.

[Bone Daddy]

Boy this thread needs to "resurface" I'm so sorry for that remark....LMAO

[BrainDamage]

And yet another thread that went South..

Where are our minds?

[crownvic]

Originally posted by BrainDamage
And yet another thread that went South..

Where are our minds?

I'm glad you agree..