cerberus
June 25th, 2001, 04:01 PM
Ok...a little history here...My mom is the president in her state of AARP...and she reminds me every time when we talk that I have only 4 years before my time has come to join...here is a little ditty that my mom sent me...now please be kind...as she is old:eek:
But I "thought" some of yall would appreciate this one...
Dang...I am gald that she isn't a member here as she would drag that belt out and beat me within an inch of my life!
Hey mom...send money!...oh...those days are over with:(
Quote from my mom...just as she sent it...
">I'M A SENIOR CITIZEN & proud of it
>
>I'm the life of the party... even when it lasts until 8 p.m.
>I'm very good at opening childproof caps with a hammer.
>I'm usually interested in going home before I get to where
>I am going. I'm good on a trip for at least an hour without
>my aspirin, beano, and antacid.
>
>I'm the first one to find the bathroom wherever I go.
>I'm awake many hours before my body allows me to get up.
>I'm smiling all the time because I can't hear a word you're saying.
>I'm very good at telling stories...over and over and over and over.
>I'm aware that other people's grandchildren are not as bright as mine.
>I'm so cared for: long term care, eye care, private care, and dental care.
>I'm not grouchy; I just don't like traffic, waiting, crowds, children, and
politicians.
>
>I'm positive I did housework correctly before my mate retired.
>I'm sure everything I can't find is in a secure place.
>I'm wrinkled, saggy, lumpy, and that's just my left leg.
>I'm having trouble remembering simple words like... uh ???... uh.
>I'm now spending more time with my pillows than with my mate.
>I'm realizing that aging is not for sissies. I'm anti-everything now:
>anti-fat, anti-smoke, anti-noise, anti-inflammatory.
>
>I'm walking more (to the bathroom) and enjoying it less.
>I'm going to reveal what goes on behind closed doors... absolutely
nothing!
>If you are what you eat, I'm Shredded Wheat and All Bran.
>I'm sure they are making adults much younger these days.
>I'm in the initial stage of my golden years... SS, CD's, IRA'S, AARP.
>I'm wondering, if you're only as old as you feel,
>how could I possibly be alive at 150?
>
>I'm supporting all movements now.... by eating bran, prunes, and
>raisins. I'm a walking storeroom of facts...I've just lost the storeroom.
>I'm a SENIOR CITIZEN ... and I think I am having the time of my life!!!!
>
>Now if I could only remember who sent this to me,
>I would send it to many more!
>
>You didn't send it, did you?"
But I "thought" some of yall would appreciate this one...
Dang...I am gald that she isn't a member here as she would drag that belt out and beat me within an inch of my life!
Hey mom...send money!...oh...those days are over with:(
Quote from my mom...just as she sent it...
">I'M A SENIOR CITIZEN & proud of it
>
>I'm the life of the party... even when it lasts until 8 p.m.
>I'm very good at opening childproof caps with a hammer.
>I'm usually interested in going home before I get to where
>I am going. I'm good on a trip for at least an hour without
>my aspirin, beano, and antacid.
>
>I'm the first one to find the bathroom wherever I go.
>I'm awake many hours before my body allows me to get up.
>I'm smiling all the time because I can't hear a word you're saying.
>I'm very good at telling stories...over and over and over and over.
>I'm aware that other people's grandchildren are not as bright as mine.
>I'm so cared for: long term care, eye care, private care, and dental care.
>I'm not grouchy; I just don't like traffic, waiting, crowds, children, and
politicians.
>
>I'm positive I did housework correctly before my mate retired.
>I'm sure everything I can't find is in a secure place.
>I'm wrinkled, saggy, lumpy, and that's just my left leg.
>I'm having trouble remembering simple words like... uh ???... uh.
>I'm now spending more time with my pillows than with my mate.
>I'm realizing that aging is not for sissies. I'm anti-everything now:
>anti-fat, anti-smoke, anti-noise, anti-inflammatory.
>
>I'm walking more (to the bathroom) and enjoying it less.
>I'm going to reveal what goes on behind closed doors... absolutely
nothing!
>If you are what you eat, I'm Shredded Wheat and All Bran.
>I'm sure they are making adults much younger these days.
>I'm in the initial stage of my golden years... SS, CD's, IRA'S, AARP.
>I'm wondering, if you're only as old as you feel,
>how could I possibly be alive at 150?
>
>I'm supporting all movements now.... by eating bran, prunes, and
>raisins. I'm a walking storeroom of facts...I've just lost the storeroom.
>I'm a SENIOR CITIZEN ... and I think I am having the time of my life!!!!
>
>Now if I could only remember who sent this to me,
>I would send it to many more!
>
>You didn't send it, did you?"