#1 Leafs Fan
July 9th, 2001, 11:37 AM
Signs that you are a Pure Italian!
1. As a child, your last week of summer holidays were
always spent putting caps on tomato filled Mio Bottles.
2. Contrary to medical literature, you still believe that
eating two plates of pasta, three fried veal cutlets,
two sausages and a half bottle of wine makes for a
healthy meal.
3. You 'close' the light and 'open' the TV.
4. You maintain that broom handles, wooden spoons, and
slippers are tools for effective parenting.
5. Every picture frame, salt shaker, nut cracker, candle
holder, and butter knife in your home is a 'bombiniere'
from previous weddings.
6. Your father signed you up for hockey just long enough to
accumulate enough broken sticks for his garden.
7. You use one or more tubs of DEP hair gel per week,
proud of your chest hair and wear platform leather
boots.
8. "Forget about it..." and "Hey, How YOU doin'?" is common
vocabulary.
9. You and your friends go out for a caffe a minimum of 4
times a week, YET you have never set foot in a donut
shop or tasted North American style coffee.
10. You have one relative named Dina, Dino, Gina, Gino,
Lina, Pina, Pino, Rina, or Tina.
11. You go to the local "Family Fitness" gym dressed in
your Adidas or Kappa track suit, with no intention of
breaking a sweat, but rather as a social call to see
who's hangin out.
12. You own CD's by Stevie B, Lil' Suzy, and Joee and at
least 2 freestyle compilations albums.
13. You have the retarted notion that at least one of the
three necklaces around your neck MUST hang outside of
your shirt.
14. In your circle of friends, at least one guy has followed
tradition and works in construction, while another guy
is 250+ lbs working as a bouncer at some nightclub.
15. On Saturday night, instead of taking your girlfriend
out, you'd rather spend it with the guys talking! about
your Mustang. And why not? She accepts you for the
a**hole you are.
16. And Because of years of getting yelled at by your
mother, you know more saints names than the Pope.
1. As a child, your last week of summer holidays were
always spent putting caps on tomato filled Mio Bottles.
2. Contrary to medical literature, you still believe that
eating two plates of pasta, three fried veal cutlets,
two sausages and a half bottle of wine makes for a
healthy meal.
3. You 'close' the light and 'open' the TV.
4. You maintain that broom handles, wooden spoons, and
slippers are tools for effective parenting.
5. Every picture frame, salt shaker, nut cracker, candle
holder, and butter knife in your home is a 'bombiniere'
from previous weddings.
6. Your father signed you up for hockey just long enough to
accumulate enough broken sticks for his garden.
7. You use one or more tubs of DEP hair gel per week,
proud of your chest hair and wear platform leather
boots.
8. "Forget about it..." and "Hey, How YOU doin'?" is common
vocabulary.
9. You and your friends go out for a caffe a minimum of 4
times a week, YET you have never set foot in a donut
shop or tasted North American style coffee.
10. You have one relative named Dina, Dino, Gina, Gino,
Lina, Pina, Pino, Rina, or Tina.
11. You go to the local "Family Fitness" gym dressed in
your Adidas or Kappa track suit, with no intention of
breaking a sweat, but rather as a social call to see
who's hangin out.
12. You own CD's by Stevie B, Lil' Suzy, and Joee and at
least 2 freestyle compilations albums.
13. You have the retarted notion that at least one of the
three necklaces around your neck MUST hang outside of
your shirt.
14. In your circle of friends, at least one guy has followed
tradition and works in construction, while another guy
is 250+ lbs working as a bouncer at some nightclub.
15. On Saturday night, instead of taking your girlfriend
out, you'd rather spend it with the guys talking! about
your Mustang. And why not? She accepts you for the
a**hole you are.
16. And Because of years of getting yelled at by your
mother, you know more saints names than the Pope.