ltcbm
September 19th, 2001, 05:02 PM
One day a guy walked into a bar with a monkey on his shoulder, sit down and asked the bartender for a shot. The bartender looked at the man and firmly said we do not allow any animals of any kind in this bar. The man replied saying look this monkey is my best friend, he will not bother anything or anybody. You will not even know he's here. Besides if he causes any damage or trouble I,ll gladly take respounciblity fot it.
The bartender finnally agreed to it but said he would keep an eye on the monkey. The man got his drink and started drinking. Just a few minutes later the monkey jumped over to a pool table and grabed up the cue ball and swallowed it. The bartender very upset yelled at the man and told him to get the monkey out of his bar. The man said he was very sorry and in a few days the monkey would pass the ball and he would clean it up and bring it back to the bartender. The bartender shook his head in agreement and anger and pointed to the door.
Few days later sure enough the man brought back the cue ball as he promised, but with the monkey on his shoulder again. The bartender took the ball but told the man 'I told you last time, no animals'. the man said he only wanted 1 beer and he and the monkey would be gone. The bartender slowly agreed and gave him a beer. When the bartender looked at the monkey, the monkey was on the bar graping peanuts out of the bucket. Then he noticed that the monkey was taking the peanut, sticking 'em in his ass then eating them. The bartender was outraged and yelled "get that crazy monkey out of my bar" Man replied " why you call my monkey crazy". bartender replied " he's sticking peanuts up his a** then eating them". man then replied " mister he's not crazy, he's just checking the size first"
The bartender finnally agreed to it but said he would keep an eye on the monkey. The man got his drink and started drinking. Just a few minutes later the monkey jumped over to a pool table and grabed up the cue ball and swallowed it. The bartender very upset yelled at the man and told him to get the monkey out of his bar. The man said he was very sorry and in a few days the monkey would pass the ball and he would clean it up and bring it back to the bartender. The bartender shook his head in agreement and anger and pointed to the door.
Few days later sure enough the man brought back the cue ball as he promised, but with the monkey on his shoulder again. The bartender took the ball but told the man 'I told you last time, no animals'. the man said he only wanted 1 beer and he and the monkey would be gone. The bartender slowly agreed and gave him a beer. When the bartender looked at the monkey, the monkey was on the bar graping peanuts out of the bucket. Then he noticed that the monkey was taking the peanut, sticking 'em in his ass then eating them. The bartender was outraged and yelled "get that crazy monkey out of my bar" Man replied " why you call my monkey crazy". bartender replied " he's sticking peanuts up his a** then eating them". man then replied " mister he's not crazy, he's just checking the size first"